


Menstrual Cycles (Genderbent Davekat Oneshot)

by DirkDatAssStrider



Category: Homestuck
Genre: DAVE AND KARKAT ARE GENDERBENT, F/F, Its only fluff, Menstrual Cycles, No Smut, THEY ARE FEMALE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-13
Updated: 2015-09-13
Packaged: 2018-04-20 14:16:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4790369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DirkDatAssStrider/pseuds/DirkDatAssStrider
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave has yet to fully blossom into a woman, and Karkat doesn't even understand what the fuck that's supposed to mean.</p><p>(A fluff-only genderbent Davekat oneshot about a woman's natural body processes.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Menstrual Cycles (Genderbent Davekat Oneshot)

**Author's Note:**

> /uh I really don’t like the names some people have for genderbend dave and karkat. Like I’m not gonna call them Dove or Karkit, cuz that sounds pretty lame. I’m probably just going to go with their regular names, but they’re still girls. But it’s Sis Strider instead of Bro.   
> Also TW: periods and menstrual cycles??/

Your name is DAVE STRIDER and you’ve survived multiple strifes with Sis and god knows how fucking many deaths on alternate timelines. Dead Daves are practically fucking coming out of your goddamn ears at this point. The point is—you’re a tough gal and you aren’t going to be brought to your knees by something as stupid as period cramps.

 

You hadn’t started your period before all the shit with the world ending had went down. Sis didn’t have the chance to sit you down and warn you about this—although even if she did have the chance, you got a gut feeling that the conversation wouldn’t extend beyond her handing you a box of tampons and wishing you good fucking luck with that uterus.

 

But anyways—back to said uterus and how it was hellbent on murdering you.

 

The second year on the meteor, you were fifteen, you went to the bathroom and found a little surprise from Mother Nature. You’d kind of been dreading this moment for a long time fully convinced that your body was defective and you weren’t ever going to ‘fully bloom into a woman’, or that gods just didn’t have natural body processes.

 

You’d spent a good two fucking hours trying to alchemize a tampon or a pad or _anything_ to make it stop. You won’t admit that you were on the brink of tears with how desperate you felt, but you finally arose with a combination that gifted you an oddly shaped pad substitute.

 

Oh thank the gods.

 

You grasp that thing like it was the holy motherfucking grail, saving the code for later use. You believe in magic and all things good about paradox space, a wild grin splitting your face in two.

 

“Hey, dunderfuck, got a minut--?” Karkat’s standing in the doorway of the little lab, both of her eyebrows raised to her hairline, her lips contorted into an odd scowl. You would have considered that expression hilarious any other time if embarrassment wasn’t curling in your gut, your face heating up as you stood frozen, clutching that pad like it was a lifeboat and you were fucking drowning in the red sea.

 

“Dave.” 

 

You realized that you were standing literally frozen, and you scramble to straighten your stance and draw your face into a painfully blank expression. “Yo, what’s up, nubs?”

 

You’re playing it off cool, but internally, you’re freaking out. Out of all people, it had to be the one you have a huge homo crush on.

 

“Dave,” She repeats, crossing her arms over her chest and jutting her hip out to one side, a pose that could be considered very sassy. Her lips curl into a very sadistic smile, her voice sickly sweet as she speaks. “What’s that?”

 

“What’s what?” you answer almost too quickly, shoving both of your hands behind your back, under your cape. Real smooth. Real fucking cool, Strider.

 

“Nice try, fuckface.” She crosses the room quickly, pouncing on you like a cat with a bowl of fresh cream, reaching around you with both of her hands. It doesn’t work—she’s too short and you have time to maneuver it so you’re out of her direct warpath, clutching your stomach as another cramp rolls through your lower belly.

 

“F-Fuck.” You pant, your eyebrows furrowing.

 

Karkat stops trying to reach her grabby hands all over you, and shoots you a look of concern as you stumble, your forehead pressing against the cool wall of the tiny room.

 

“You aren’t injured, are you?? Strider, I swear if you fucking bleed out after we’ve made it this far—“

 

“Ugh, no, I’m fine. Chill.” You straighten up and look down at her, pursing your lips together to keep from groaning.

 

“Are you dying?”

 

“No.”

 

“Than what’s fucking wrong? Why are you acting so weird?”

 

“It’s just human bullshit that you shouldn’t worry your pretty little head about, princess.”

 

She growls at you. Fucking _growls_ . “I’m not a _princess_ , Strider. And I’m going to worry my pretty little head about it. Now you’re going to tell me what’s up or I’m going to go have Lalonde indulge my curiosity about this so called ‘human bullshit’.”

 

Oh god no. Lalonde would draw a fucking diagram for her, that’s how fucked up he is. 

 

“Karkat, you’re the biggest cunt. I’m informing you of this in case you didn’t know.”

 

“I don’t know what that is, but I’m going to assume it’s an insult and I really don’t give a flying fuck. So spill it.”

 

===>

 

You recant your entire tale of woe to her—and as if to add insult to injury, inform her that every human girl goes through the same shit at least once a month, accompanied by earth shattering cramps. She stares at you for minute, horrified, with wide grey and red tinged eyes and an open mouth.

 

And then she grabs your hand and leads you to her room, not saying anything.

 

You figure it’d be best to just go along with it, so you don’t say anything as she guides you through winding hallways of the meteor—making it to her small room a few minutes later. Well, it didn’t actually start out as a bedroom, but she modified it with a plush bed, a loveseat sofa, a TV, and some movie posters. 

 

You excuse yourself to the bathroom next door and put that pad to good use. When you reemerged, she had set up a nest of blankets on the couch, her tiny body cuddled into one side as she fiddled around with the remote to the DVD player. On the coffee table in front of her, she had an assortment of what you thought was candy, most of which you haven’t seen before.

 

Oh god. She’s perfect.

 

“Get over here, asshole.”

 

“Wow, you sure know how to sweet talk a gal.” You say dryly, moving to snuggle into the blankets beside her anyway. She fits her head between your shoulder and your neck, and you’d be fucking lying if you said it wasn’t the cutest thing. 

 

She picks a troll movie, (What did you expect?), with a ridiculously long title that took up the entire title screen. It was something about a blueblood fucking a rustblood and then a fuchsia blood wants a hatemance with the blueblood so the rustblood is an austiptice??? Fuck if you were even paying attention.

 

You were actually looking at her.

 

She’s actually pretty selfless most of the time, which surprised you after you’d first met her in person. She’s also pretty—in that unconventional way with her soft cheeks and curled lashes and pouty lips. Although she’s short, she’s curvy with hips wider than her bust. Her coarse black hair was pressed against your collar as you gave her the sideeye, not even worried about her catching you staring. She was way too absorbed in the movie for that, jostling and scowling—and even in some rare occasions—laughing. 

 

Oh god she has a cute laugh.

 

Two hours later and you’re eating what you’re pretty sure is the troll equivalent to chocolate—although it’s slightly more bitter and has an odd after taste, you eat it all anyway. Karkat blinks up at you with sleepy eyes when the credits roll, and you offer her a small reassuring smile.

 

She rubs her head back into your shoulder, sighing softly. “You humans are made of tougher shit than I thought. Bleeding continuously for seven days straight and not dying? You sure you’re okay and you’re not bullshitting?”

 

“I’m fine, stop worrying.” To emphasize your point, you stretch out your legs, ignoring the pang in your lower stomach. “Why are you so concerned about it anyway?”

 

“Well because even though you’re an impossible bitch most of the time, we’re in it for the long run.” 

 

“Gee, thanks.”

 

“You’re welcome.” She full out smiles at you, and you have to keep yourself from swoonin’ . “I’d really fucking miss how annoying you are if you bleed out on me.”

 

That comment catches you so off guard that you gape at her, “Damn. I’m honest to god flattered.”

 

She punched you in the arm playfully, eyes sparkling. “As you should be.” She buries her face in your shoulder, muffling her voice as she spoke. It sounded like “Mmph unf yeuu.”

 

You cup your ear, eyebrows raising. “Sorry, what was that?”

 

“I said that I don’t hate you, fuckface.”

 

“And here I was, with the impression that you absolutely detested me.”

 

“Well I don’t.”

 

You bury your face in her fluffy hair. It smelled odd, but not bad—just a scent you couldn’t place. She was so small that you couldn’t help wrapping your arms around her, pulling her thin body in your embrace. She made a soft sound of surprise, looking up at you with wide, grey and red flecked eyes.

 

“I don’t hate you, either, dude.” You mutter, placing a small kiss on the tip of her button nose. She scowled, although her face flushed at the touch. You laugh a little, equally as nervous. You couldn’t uphold the smooth coolkid façade when the person you loved the most was being super cute and blushy blushy right in your arms. It was too late for you. You were so far wrapped up in Vantas’s cute face that it was frightening. 

 

“In fact,” you continue, rambling because you were nervous, “I would consider it the opposite of hate, probably.”

 

“Oh.” Her blush deepened considerably.

 

“I mean, if that’s not cool or whatever, it’s fine.” You turn your head, trying to appear as if it didn’t care if Karkat said yes or no. But it did. A lot. Your heart squeezed in your chest in anticipation.

 

She cups your cheeks and turns your face so that you’re staring right in her eyes. She places a soft, chaste kiss on your lips, light and airy. Your face explodes in heat as her gaze locked with yours, more out of embarrassment than anything. 

 

“Get over here, you big doof.” She says, and you cuddle into her side, sighing contentedly. 

 

You two finish the movie in silence, cuddled closely together, and you figure that it was a pretty good damn way to remember your first period.


End file.
